Sex has been a topic that Virgo-chan and a few other people have been bringing to my attention for a while. After all, sensuality and sexuality are closely relates to boudoir, and BDSM is about power which is a theme I explore a lot. And in my old Catholic years, I was very invested in the Theology of the Body and sacred sexuality, so I have a vague interest in Tantra. It was not a surprise that I found out I am an Energetic in Jaiya’s Blueprint.
Last month, I took part in the Erotic Mapping workshop run by Holisticism for their Solstice school, and it was great to be alongside other women and non-binary folks (I don’t believe there were men in the group, but I may be wrong) having such an open conversation around what we want.
I was a teenager in the mid and late 2000s, and that was a time of re-runs of Sex and the City (which started in 1998, and had the first film out in 2008) and teen drama where girls’ lives revolved around guys except for the L World, where they revolved around Shane. I haven’t seen it in forever but I honestly can’t remember much of everyone else’s drama, it kinda feels like Shane had the most of it.
Conversely, in Christian spaces it was still closely connected to the purity culture of the 90s, having a resurgence with teen idols like the Disney Channel stars including the sons of a pastor, the Jonas Brothers. There was little room for balanced conversation among the magazine headlines talking about how to please your man, and the undercurrent of shame with the characters who took charge of their own desires like Samantha, my Sex and the City favourite as well as almost namesake (long story).
It’s unsurprising, perhaps, that as I reach the age of the women in Sex and the City, the kind of female roundtables conversations I have are more positive. We have been burnt by that approach in our 20s, and entered our 30s with an inner drive for change.
And it’s in this spirit that I feel privileged to have been able to bring Shelby on the show more than once.
In our previous conversation we talked about finding intimacy with ourselves and our intuition. Then, in what I released as a two part episode, we talked about sex and kink, self-expression, and where we see those themes play out in Astrology since Astrology reflects life.
Meet Shelby Avann
Shelby is an intimacy coach and healer. As an intimacy coach, she is a professional guide trained in attachment theory, intimacy and sexuality practices, tantra, kink and reiki and helps individuals enhance their emotional, physical, and relational connections. She offers a playful approach to exploring relationships, sex and intimacy within a consensual, communicative and healing coaching structure. Shelby loves blending the realms of spirituality and science in her coaching and healings.
Links
Get your free Intimacy Yes, No, Maybe Checklist on my website www.shelbyavann.ca
Instagram : @intimacymistress
Youtube: @SARelationshipIntimacyCoaching
